Staying Still

A few weeks ago, a friend of mine asked me what had happened to my blog. I shrugged my shoulders, which she couldn’t see because we were chatting over Facebook, and then I told her that maybe I’d try to write more in the New Year. Obviously, such overwhelming demand cannot be ignored. The masses had spoken. So what you see here is the start of a regular blog about my life in Chile. That, or an ambitious attempt at a New Year’s resolution doomed to fizzle out over the next four weeks. Only time will tell.

It’s tempting to spend this first blog post looking over the year that was, to do a little “Looking back,” as Mike and the Mechanics would say. But I hesitate to do that because, firstly, that would take too long, and secondly, all my best material is in the past and I’d have nothing to write about next week.

The future is equally as daunting. I’ve been living in Chile for about two years now, and it feels like decisions need to be made. As The Clash would say, “Should I stay or should I go?” Surely it’s about time I sought out new territory. A change of scenery would be lovely. New challenges are destined to be exciting. But at the same time, what might happen if I stay in a place that I’ve learned to be comfortable in? I’ve made contacts; I should exploit them. I’ve learned about restaurants I’ve yet to try. There are dodgy neighbourhoods I’ve yet to be mugged in. On top of that, I’ve just gotten my permanent residency visa, which means I can apply for loans and bury myself in debt.

It stands to reason, then, that the best thing for it is to do a little “looking forward,” as Neil Young would say. So I’m going to use my first blog of 2017 to lay out a list of resolutions, expectations, and predictions I have for the year ahead.

I expect to write more

Ideally, one short column a week would be good. More would be gooder. And morer would be goodest. But I’m lazy, so how about we wait until blog number two comes out and then we’ll use maths to calculate how long it’ll take for the third blog to appear? I think the thing that usually turns me off writing is the expectation that I’ve got to churn out 3 000 words or more. Well, no more! I’m going to try to keep things short and punchy, like Grumpy from Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

Grumpy the Dwarf
Sure, he was passive aggressive most of the time, but Grumpy wouldn’t hesitate to punch you in the thigh.


I expect to run a marathon

Yes, I know I did just say I was lazy, but the Santiago Marathon is happening in April, and I want to impress you guys. Plus, succeed or fail, I’m sure it’ll make for an interesting blog post in the future. So we’ve got that to look forward to, I guess.

I’m going to join a book club

This is not so much a resolution as something I’m looking forward to. A friend of mine proposed this at the end of last year, and it looks like it’s really going to happen. It’ll only start in March, though, once everyone returns from their summer vacation. The focus of this club is going to be non-fiction books, mostly about science. I definitely need more science-y books in my life. As Jimmy Eat World would say, “Well there’s lots of smart ideas in books I’ve never read.” I am determined to get to the bottom of this.

Continue with improv classes

Last year, I started taking improv classes, and they were fantastic. Apart from the wonderful friends I made, I also learned that “improv” is short for “improvisation,” and not a terrible way of spelling “improve.” It was a great confidence-booster, and I look forward to further developing those quick-thinking skills in the future.

The key to good improvisation is to stand and stare, statue-like, while your fellow actor struggles to carry the entire scene.


Be naked more

In 2016 I found myself being naked quite often, and without fail I always enjoyed the experience. Sometimes it was body paint, and sometimes it was through photography. Either way, I intend to bring my naked-to-clothed ratio closer to equilibrium in 2017.

Body Paint
I cropped my feet out of this picture because I wanted to leave a little something to the imagination.


Those are the most important goals I can think of right now, mostly because I got distracted by a naked picture of myself. But let me not overwhelm myself (and you, Dear Reader) with too many objectives. I’m optimistic about the future. I believe that good things lie ahead. And if they’re not good, well, then at least let’s hope they make for a good blog post.


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